Getting the Wellness Knocked Out of You

You know how when you get a cold, all you can think about is getting better? You dream about all the things that you will do when you are feeling better. Like having dinner with friends. Or going for a run in the park. Or getting that special project done at work.

When our wellness gets out of whack, we work hard to get it back. We no longer take it for granted. This is true with the common cold, but is even more true the more serious our wellness is in threat.

Tricia Kieran, one of our account folks here at the agency, had one of those experiences where she literally had the wellness knocked out of her, and she's longing to get it back. She recounts the ongoing experience here.

Hope this finds you well -- Jim.

How are you feeling, Tricia?:

Let me just say that it is not advisable to put one’s head directly into the blades of a high-powered ceiling fan in a low-ceiling beach house. First of all, it is both immediately painful and surprisingly disorienting. And secondly, hearing your husband tell you, “You’re OK” ten times in a row as he and your son stare at your bleeding head is not convincing ... at all.

If you ignore my advice and decide to have a go at a ceiling fan near you, you too may wind up with five staples in your head, and you too may end up with your husband receiving detailed information on: 

- how to detect a concussion (plans for July 4th margaritas and intense Trivial Pursuit games NOT INCLUDED) 

- a home staple remover kit for a belated wife torture session (instructions NOT INCLUDED). 

Definitely included are some Tylenol and this little gem of information from a cheerful nurse: staples can get really hot in the sun, so it’s best to wear a hat at the beach. Ouch.

Anyone who knows me knows I have never been blessed with grace. I broke my big toe when I was two “rearranging” my parent’s bottles of wine. I had at least 12 stitches in my head before I was ten because of repeated encounters with the same hard-cornered couch and a chance encounter with my sister’s spilled orange juice (near a hard-cornered refrigerator). Arms out of sockets. Bikes flipped over. Stairs descended. Tendons sprained. It seems if you build it, I’ll come hit it. 

The world is my own klutzy Field of Dreams. If I’m walking on the sidewalk, I’ll kick whatever garbage is in my path. If there’s a waiter behind me, I’ll use dramatic hand gestures, ensuring a spilled tray of watermelon margaritas. If I’m putting on a sports bra in a small locker room, I not only punch the woman next to me, I punch her in the face.

And if you’re wondering why I put my own head into a ceiling fan, I was jumping on the bed to cover my son with a blanket while he was napping. Naturally.

But whether it was my Mom removing bandages or a doctor removing a nasty cast, I’ve always been fortunate to be able to return to a state of wellness soon after a less than graceful event. So seven days after the fan incident, after my husband’s staple game of Operation (touch the staple and she screams), I was expecting a speedy return to my normal state of “bruisy” wellness.

It just didn’t work out that way. After a trip to a PCP, ENT, ER, a neurologist and after having brain and spinal MRIs, it appears I am experiencing post-event head trauma. After some online searching, I learned that post-concussion syndrome can last days, weeks, months … or forever. 

Headaches and ear ringing…forever? The thought of having this indefinitely definitely puts being well in tantalizing perspective. I’ll take a laceration or bad bruising any day over this nagging noggin limbo.

I may shake my fist and mutter at ceiling fans now, but I also can’t wait for the day when I’m well again. Illness free, and ready for another tiny disaster.

- Tricia Kieran, VP Account Supervisor at Saatchi & Saatchi Wellness